Wednesday, April 29th, 2009
Yup.
This is one of those articles that should have no place in a financial freedom blog.
Let’s be honest. Who am I kdding?
There’s a reason I haven’t been one of those success stories I constantly read about. You know the one, (The typical Dave Ramsey caller just sending in their last mortgage payment and get to yell “I’M DEBT FREE!!!” with some idiot named Jimbo in the background). I Loathe to become “Jimbo”.
Or do I?
How is it I can hear the background so clearly in their household? And how did they pay off $120K in mortgage debt in five years while only bringing home $60K/year between them? I started thinking about the difference between me and them and quickly realized that the reason that their background is so quiet is because of the absense of kids.
Now, I’m probably an atypical parent that makes jokes about kids being worrisome or being around. Truth is, I’d be lost without them. I have a great nuclear family and couldn’t /wouldn’t ask for anything more out of what the wifey and I have made. Having said that, we currently have 4.7 to be exact (one due in July) so there has to be an end to this madness somewhere right?
RIGHT! On April 10th, 2009. I sat down on the Dr. Teitjan’s slab in Lee’s Summit, MO and did the unthinkable/most femenizing thing a man could do…
I GOT SNIPPED!
Not only did I get snipped. Teitjan had problems finding my left vas deferens and poked and prodded for 20 minutes too long causing post operative complications. It’s not his fault my vas defrens was retracted further than normal so I blame him for nothing. However that doesn’t stop the hemotoma I’ve now developed immediately afterwards because of the complications.
So as I’m typing this article almost 3 weeks to the day later, I have a hard lump the size of a egg in my scrotum. It’s not as bad as it sounds and Teitjan says it should go down after several weeks while the body slowly absorbs it.
Now enough about my castration. Back to Jimbo in the background. Jimbo is able to pay his mortgage down so quickly because he doesn’t have the pleasure of paying for $80/month gymnastic classes, $250 for softball registrations, $640-$1400/month in daycare (when the wife was working), $1000 Christmases, $80 every time a violin string gets severed. I stopped there but that doesn’t include the co-pays and extra money we have to pay for health care costs for the kids.
Sounds like I’m bitching about my predicament with the kids. Trust me, I’m not. I love my life and the challenges that present themselves. The kids keep the wife and I young, entertained, and constantly appreciative.
So while I’d love to have that paid off mortgage in the next five years, I’m going to have to cut back on my intensity towards my goal because our family is evolving at the moment. We’ll eventually get there, but I’ve come to understand that Rome wasn’t built in a day (we’re only 32) and sometimes it’s just not in the cards.
The reason I’m writing this is because even though I can get preachy/demanding towards my goal, I have to realize that my goal is to really be healthy and fit for my kids for as long as I can. I’ve always realized it and have never put the kids or my family second. I just felt I needed to say it loud in case some of you may have forgotten.
Having had this cum-bah-yah moment… we still need to get to work on our secondary goal on becoming debt free so having kids doesn’t let us off the hook.
Posted in Inspirational, Personal debt, Uncategorized, goals, relapses | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, May 28th, 2008
In part of changing the family legacy, we have the naysayers that believe giving to a child is the wrong thing to do because they haven’t worked for it like you did and won’t appreciate it. In a sense, that may be true but what about those that are already doing it?
Is it that hard to raise a child to be responsible so that they can carry on and build on the template we’ll create with out debt free financial independence?
Starting when the child can comprehend wants, we should limit them so that they aren’t used to getting their way. This instills that they either have to work for what they want or that it’s not available to them. This simple discipline is the most important element in parenting to raising a responsible child.
When I was coming up, I just had to have the new Nike, British Knights or Fila’s (at the time). I was brought up on, if you want something you have to work for it. So my mother would pay for half of anything I wanted meaning I had to come up with the other half. I accomplished everything I wanted as a child from manual labor jobs as cutting grass, chores and selling things wasn’t out of the question.
When I became of car age I was given an old burnt orange 1978 Buick Skylark (In the mid 90’s). I was basically forced to get the car as I didn’t want to get one because of the responsibility that came along with it (insurance, drivers license, etc). However, once I did get the $400 beater, I had to pay for everything to maintain it.
See the trend? I’ve had to work for everything I’ve received. My parents were well off enough that they could have paid my way or given me everything I’ve ever wanted as a child. Through hard work and determination within the lessons they were teaching I’ve become a responsible adult.
So in order to start my legacy I’m trying little subtle things to start planting the seed in my kids. Instead of playing music in the car while the 11yo is in the car. I’ll play Dave Ramsey TMM or FPU. She may not be paying much attention right now but just like kids and church or my dad with sports radio, she’ll start familiarizing herself with the message.
Next we follow Daves instructions on the compensatory allowance system. She gets $10/week (broken down into 3 parts) to clean the kitchen after the family eats dinner Monday-Friday. $4 goes to a savings account/envelope (which she can’t spend). Goes to a Give away to charity or somewhere account while the remaining $4 goes to her to spend as she chooses.
The $4 savings system is a way to start planting the SAVE SAVE SAVE seed early. It teaches discipline and lets her know that in order to get something she wants, she’s going to have to work for it.
The $2 “give away” portion is liken to taxes taken out of the check (Plus it’s nice to give). She’s already donated $12 to a local fundraising event for her school. She was really excited to give the $ too.
The $4 for her is to let her enjoy the fruits of her labor. She even spends that responsibly too while sometimes saving that portion for bigger purchases also.
I haven’t given her any speeches about debt or financial independence, because she’s too young and I want her to stay that way. But at the same time, I’m instilling valuable lessons that reach much further than any amount of talking I can get through to an 11 year old.
When I do give her the speech, I’m sure it’ll be full of “Credit Cards are the devil” cult speak.
Time changes things but at this rate, since I “can’t take it with me”, I’m building wealth and financial independence for my kids & kids kids & their kids. With the daily lessons being taught I hope they’ll hit the ground running when I pass the torch.
Posted in Informational, Inspirational, Personal debt, education, goals | No Comments »
